Seeing Through the Eyes of Gratitude

I recently began a week long exercise in keeping a gratitude journal.  Each night I would write down all the things I was thankful for, sometimes just a simple line, sometimes writing a paragraph, but always acknowledging the blessings in my life. 

At the start of the exercise I thought of myself as a pretty grateful person.  I take time to enjoy the way the breeze feels on my face, the color of the sky at sunset, the first bloom of the season.  What I found is that I was barely scrapping the tip of the proverbial iceberg.  In the past when I have kept a journal I have found it difficult to find anything to write about, but this was different, I had trouble putting my pen down each night.  I would go to bed with a smile on my face because all my many blessings were fresh in my mind.

Never once during my week of gratitude journaling did I mention that I was grateful for my health.  I only recognized this in hind sight when I wound up in the ER the following week.  Health is one of those things like the car starting in the morning that we just take for granted until something goes out of whack.  It made me renew my vow to practice gratitude.

So here is my gratitude list for that day in the emergency room

• I am grateful to my husband for spending the day driving me to the doctor’s office and then to the hospital
• I am grateful my doctor’s office was able to quickly process my information and try to make me as comfortable as possible.
• I am grateful the hospital has valet parking for the ER so that my husband could stay with me, instead of spending time parking and finding me later.
• I am grateful for the quick admittance to the ER.  There was no wait to get a room.
• I am grateful for drugs they gave me to help reduce the pain.
• I am grateful for the support of a friend who works in the hospital who took the time out of his schedule to come see me.
• I am grateful for the health insurance that made this whole ordeal much easier to deal with.
• I was grateful to be released to my own bed at 11:00 p.m. that evening instead of having to stay overnight for observation.
• I am grateful for the staff that helped move me to tests and made the day go very smoothly.
• I am grateful for the licks of my puppies who welcomed me home that evening and who did not disturb me in my sleep.
• I am grateful for the support of my supervisors who continue to give me time to work around doctor’s schedules.
• I am grateful for the support and prayer of friends and family as we look for answers.
• I am grateful to my doctor for being so proactive and getting me into specialists and tests much faster than the average waiting time.
• I am grateful for the 6 lbs. that I have lost
• I am grateful for the opportunity to change the way I eat

So, am I grateful that I wound up in the ER? I don’t know that I would go that far, but it was a great opportunity to practice being in gratitude.  I think my outlook changed what could have been a terrible experience.

You don’t need to have anything drastic happen for you to begin your own exercise in gratitude, but I certainly found it helpful to look for the silver lining.  They say seeing is believing, but I think it is the other way around.  If you believe it is so, you will see it that way.  Because I was looking for opportunities to be grateful I found them at every turn.

Retreat to Advance

A few days before I attend a spiritual retreat my mom relayed to me a conversation she had with my brother on the topic of retreats.  Rather tongue in cheek he informed her that at his church only the women retreat, when the men get together they “ advance”.  This stayed on my mind during my weekend retreat as I considered what it meant to retreat.

When used as a verb dictionary.com states that to retreat is an act of withdrawal, often used in military terms either as a forced withdrawal or a strategic tactic.  As a noun it is a place of quiet and solitude often used for prayer.

My brother’s play on words about not retreating always advancing reminds of someone who will continue driving for hours instead of stopping to ask for directions.  In the end, who finds their way with more ease and grace, the person who pushed ahead stumbling blindly trying to find the path?  Or the person who stopped to considered where they were going and how to get there?   For me taking time for retreat, whether a few moments of meditation or a weekend at the beach, is about taking time to reflect on where my life is going and if it is the direction I want to take.  Only by making the time to retreat out of my everyday business into a space of quiet reflection can I hope to advance in a meaningful direction.

Life and Death in my SoulCollage® deck

I recently created two new cards for my SoulCollage® deck.  On the surface these latest cards seem to be on opposite ends of the spectrum from each other. 

My “Mother” card represents my desire to be a mother as well as my power to create as I give birth to my new business.  I nurture myself and others through my SoulCollage® workshops, my Life Coaching practice and my garden.

My “Death/Transitions” card seemed to be a natural addition to my deck.  I’ve had an image I’ve been holding for a while, knowing eventually I would create a “Death” card.  I felt it was a mandatory addition to my deck as eventually we all encounter death in some form in our lives, culminating in our own physical deaths.

I was struck by the irony of creating these two cards so closely to each other, but then I realized that they go together naturally.  In order to create the changes I am working to manifest in my life I need the energy of the death card to clear the way for new things to come.  Then I will use the mother energy to create what it is I want in my life.